hook (oh my god)
This was originally written on 03.02.2002.
It seems I have a new nickname, and that nickname is “Hook”. How did I aquire this nickname, one might ask? A horrible childhood accident with a lawn mower. No such luck. While I was out today, my flatmate Rob annonced the content of one of his dreams. It involved an attractive girl who proceeded to take off her clothes in the middle of the flat. This figment of Rob’s (obviously warped) subconcious, apparemtly, only had eyes for me and I, again, apparently, in a fit of dreamland infidelity, had my way with her on the top of the kitchen table, with, get this, my hook shaped phallus. It was described by Rob as like “that muppet’s nose”, “gonzo”. If you don’t hear from me in a few days call scotland yard.