Month: July 2002

as if i needed yet another example to prove that the current administration does not represent me in any way whatsoever

originally written 07.31.2002

“In the way they’re kind of writing it right now out of the Senate Finance Committee, some people could spend their entire five years on welfare – there’s a five-year work requirement – going to college. Now, that’s not my view of helping people become independent, and it’s certainly not my view of understanding the importance of work and helping people achieve the dignity necessary so they can live a free life, free from government control.”

– george “i’m not geoff hing’s president” w. bush proving that he’s an idiot who spent his college days drinking at the frat house and is completely out of touch with the scores of college students who actually do something meaningful with what relatively few educational opportunities they’ve been granted

there’s some criticism of bush’s opposition to a blatantly communist and disgustingly radical amendment to welfare policy that would “permit only 10 percent of welfare recipients in any state to meet the work requirement by attending college” here and here. as if the ridiculousness of his reasoning and obvious personal bias aren’t indictment enough. here’s an idea – how about old gw gives his drunk ass daughter’s college fund to someone who’s willing to do something with the opportunity rather than wallow in privilege. that would be great.

hot in the city tonight

originally written 07.31.2002

it’s hot in the city tonight, but not in the fun way of the song that was on claire’s mix cd when all the kids in the house danced around and acted silly and just chilled out and had fun. it’s hot in the city in the way where you just feel like you’re swimming through the air – a slow crawl stroke making little progress toward land. maybe the swimming analogy is because of the humidity. i don’t know. it’s not so much the heat itself, it’s how it makes me feel – slow and dumb. or maybe that’s just the fatigue. i made it through my classes ok, and hacked together a bunch of stuff at work, finally finishing the documentation for the tools that i had written to make the new hires’ job a little easier. but, as soon as i got home, fatigue hit me like a sledgehammer, and i’ve been sort of sulking around the house since about 8 pm. it’s almost 10 now which means i should be able to go to sleep soon without fscking up my sleep cycle too much – not that it really matters – poor time alocation has made me into a bit of an insomniac lately anyway.

even the house seems fatigued. maybe it’s just empty. claire’s gone, shad just moved out, though i’ve still seen him a lot lately, he’s one of the few people i feel completely comfortable around these days, i just found out that paul’s gone to maine for 10 days. the rest of the house seems to be under some general malaise. adam slides quietly around the house in his normal unsettlingly serene way. matt just quit his job. katelynn’s cool, but to me she seems like the kind of person who’s got shit together but isn’t happy. strong enough to function but still struggling under some invisible burden. i’m alright i guess. not great, not poor. the jobs good, i’m doing well in school – there’s just no magic in this summer. my room seems boring and bare now that shad’s moved out, and the living room, which katelynn seems to tidy with a disturbing frequency, seems lifeless and sterile when relieved of it’s clutter.

so the reason i’m exhausted is from altogether shitty time alocation. i’m already playing catch-up and the new classes have just started. last night i went up to cleveland to see the weakerthans play a show at the grog shop. i drove up with chad, shad, and katelynn along for the ride, and had a pretty good time. we ate at soul vegetarian which is a few doors down from the venue in coventry and gorged myself on the feux-country fried steak sandwich and chili-cheese-fries. i was farting through the entire show, and embarrasingly trying to hide my indigestion in class today, but it was worth it. the two opening bands were altogether lame. one of them was cleveland’s own brandston, who i thought i had liked from their recordings, but were pretty uninspiring in person. it’s not that they were horrible, just horribly mediocre. the nail in the coffin was a cover of the pumpkin’s “today”, performed in a wholly un-ironic fashion. how dull. the weakerthans were awesome though. engaging and straightforward they sounded every bit as good as the records. they played letter of resignation which is my favorite track as well as some neat new steel guitar twinged countryish tracks. the singer (the one who used to be in propaghandi) has such a distinctive voice – it’s nasal and high, plaintive, but definitely genuine. the music is what emo music should be – emotional and personal without being histrionic. it’s weird how a lot of bands like the weakerthans are able to evoke emotions from me in a way that so-called emo music doesn’t. i still really like bands like, say, recover, it’s just that i don’t always need music that evokes ntensity and passion – sometimes meloncholy or pensiveness is in order too. but yeah, the weakerthans were awesome. totally unimposing but at the same time completely captivating. musically clever, lyrically beautiful, it was well worth sitting through the first two lame bands to see them play.

on the way home, everyone else dozed off, but we listened to all three of the dismemberment plan records that i own and i somehow managed to stay awake long enough not to drive us into a ditch. we made it back to columbus around 5:30 am, just eight hours until i had to be sitting in my material science class

i went to another good show recently as well. went over to the legion to see silencio and fire down below. erin came, which was cool because she never goes to the legion, and so did shad and yon. it wasn’t a big show by any means, but it was a good time. silencio is my favorite band in columbus right now. jazz meets technical metal meets hardcore meets math rock maybe. i dunno. it’s technical as all hell but still rocking. it makes me want to quit playing guitar. fire down below was a new-school hardcore band from philly with two vocalists. they played to maybe a dozen people. fewer if you subtract the kids who live at the legion. still, they didn’t seem to hold back and played with an intensity and a sincerity that really impressed me. it was awesome, and by the end of their set, my ears were wringing and i was soaked in sweat. the other thing that was so cool about the show is that i got to hang out with erin in my element – didn’t feel like i was compromising or missing out on anything.

a funny thing happened en route from the 7-11 to that legion show. erin noticed that someone had left her keys in the trunk of her car. erin, being the do-gooder that she is tried to locate the owner, but none of the kids on the street knew anything about the car. so, she pocketed the keys and we went to the show. yon proposed that we just leave a note later. after the show, i wrote up a note that said “dear chump, you left your keys in the trunk so we took them for safe keeping. call ***-**** (ask for geoff) and we’ll give ’em back”. erin thought the chump part was being an asshole, so i crossed it out and replaced it with “victim of misfortune”. i thought of just opening the car up and pounding on the horn, but even in showman mode i’m not that bold. i just took the keys home and left a note for my housemates in case the owner of the keys called while i was out. apparently she called the next day, and despite the rudeness of my windshield note was really grateful that we had found the keys. katelynn said that the girl told her that she was chronically leaving her keys lying around. it’s really strange. girl leaves her keys in the door, we generally leave the house unlocked, and nothing catastrophic happens. nothing gets stolen, and no one gets raped. so much for the ghetto. after the recent serial rapist scare, i’m starting to think that south campus is worlds safer than north campus.

but yeah, it’s getting to the point where i can’t even write coherently in my journal anymore. at least it’s cooling down. i’m going to take a few more swigs of my cheap kroger cranberry juice coctail, brush my teeth, and go to bed.

job skills

i just got some unsolicited e-mail that actually interested me. apparently ohio has some program that offers up to $8,000 in technical training for individuals with income less than $13,290. i’ve never really been into the whole certification game, but if i can get free training, i won’t have to stress the test so much ant it might be worthwile. even if i don’t get the ccna certification, the skills might still be worthwhile.

art class

not just the superchunk song, but also my little pipe dream. i’m bored to death of cis classes and want to do something a little more creative – don’t get me wrong, programming could be considered art – but i’m more interested in using it as a tool for a more multimedia approach than as an artform in and of itself. so, i’m trying to get in to the art 551 new media robotics class. should be interesting since i don’t have any of the prereqs, but the class looks amazingly rad. i guess i could go out and mess around with this myself, but taking a class a) makes me feel better about prioritizing it with other things in my life, and b) gives me access to a lot of hardware and supply resources from the university which is awesome. we’ll see how it goes

whirlwind

is how i’d describe my life of late. just finished with finals yesterday, and luckily they were two of the downright easiest exams i’ve ever taken. i didn’t study as much as i would have liked to, but at least the terms were short so it meant i had less time to forget already learned material. what really didn’t help was my friend alicia’s visit. alicia and i were friends in high school and played together in a punk band called fallout before i went away to be a nerd in columbus, and she went to study art at tyler in philadelpha. alicia’s in a new band called x’s x’s. this summer they’re touring, and although they could’t get a show in columbus, they stopped at the sweet life to spend the night en route between pittsburgh and chicago. i hardly ever get to see alicia, just here or there when i come home, or sometimes at a show, which is a shame, because she’s really one of my last connections to the high school period in my life. everyone else who i was friend with back then just seemed to have very different priorities in life and interests, and in the end, when i went away, it just didn’t make sense to try to preserve those ties. but alicia’s rad, and i think that being in a band with people is a lot like being in a relationship with people, so it’s good to stay in touch. besides, alicia does a lot of the stuff that i wish i would do if my priorities were different or i wasn’t a big ol’ wuss, e.g. touring all the way across the country and even into canada. it was a little weird to meet her band mates, and i fealt a little like an outsider when i would venture into their conversations, but they seemed to be cool kids, and the band got along better than most bands setting out on a tour. alicia also gave me a sweet tofu recipe which i made for the critical mass picnic and seemed to go over really well. despite the possible scholastic advantages, hanging out with old friends and living vicariously through them for a few hours is a good time.

columbus isn’t so bad after all

was my thought yesterday, as, in my post exam euphoria, i managed to have a really great afternoon/evening. i rushed home to cook up some x’s x’s breakfast, then i ran into shad and we hooked up with the rest of the critical mass kids. it was a fairly sizeable ride, at least 20 kids, and sally, johnny, chad, brian, and a bunch of other regulars were there. it was the first time i had done critical mass in months, so it was a good time. afterwards, we rode all the way up to the park of roses in clintonville and had a bit of a cookout. someone brought a grill, jami brought her new puppy which i’ll even confess was adoreable. we played kickball and my team got trounced, but still had a good time. what i realized is how much happier i am when i can feel like part of a community rather than just a clique or a small group of friends. it’s nice to go out and do something with people you haven’t seen in a while – catch up, hang out, ride bikes, whatever. it was one of the best time’s i’ve had in a while. i guess it just goes to show it’s not so much where you are, but what you do. i can’t imagine having a better time, even in a cooler city.

went to a couple of parties later that night with shad. went to brian’s, a kid shad knows, and i met at critical mass and just chilled. they had a keg and it was kind of noisy, but definitely not wanabee frat-boy asshole scene that seems dominant at 90% of columbus parties. still, it was a little weird because i’m horrible at socialization, and didn’t really know people at the party. furthermore, unlike in scotland, it seems like everybody at a columbus party knows someone else, so you can’t really strike up a conversation with strangers and meet new people. also a problem is that everyone i would know at a columbus party, i only know because they’re ultra socialites who know tons of other people, so they’re doing the whole social butterfly thing and can’t save me from my akwardness. oh well. it wasn’t a bad time. it’s good to get out every once in a while.

decided to try to write a shit-talking columbus kid gossip zine as a joke, though i’m soon realizing that i don’t even know enough kids to make it seem realistic. it would be funny as hell. columbus is so small that there’s already tons of gossip going on and there’s nothing like adding fuel to the flames. i think it’s all well intended – i’ve not met anyone who was a real asshole about gossip – one just gets sucked in and the truth gets distorted somewhere along the way

summer

originally posted 07.19.2002

but yeah. i’m looking forward to summer. and i’m talking about real summer. i’m talking cruising through the ‘burbs with the windows rolled down listening to bling bling thug-hop or rap-core which is only acceptable listening material for cruising and trying to front to 13-year-old thug wannabees or slackers with 3-foot chain wallets. i’m talking about epic skate sessions and evening soccer games. i’m talking coming out after dark because it’s too damn hot to do anything during the day. i’m talking tofu-dogs adn that cheap, bright-yellow mustard that’s fifty cents a jar. i’m talking about “celebrating your nation’s independence by blowing up a small part of it.” i’m talking about taking the day off and finding a swimming hole where you can drop from large heights into odd-colored water that is probably way too shallow for safety. i’m talking about hiking through the woods and not noticing the bug bites or the poison ivy because the woods are just that beautiful. i’m talking about finding some run down diner or convenience store and making it your place for the summer. i’m talking about life’s only headaches being the ones you get from drinking your misty slush too fast. i’m talking summer, man, summer. and i’m glad i’ll spend it with you.

reboot

trying to get started writing in this journal again is tough. hell, i don’t even read other people’s journals like i used to. i don’t think it’s that i have less free time, it’s just that, well, i think at least, since i’m back with most of my friends, i have less need to document my life as much. for me, one of the best things in life is the magic of a shared experience. something epic, or habitual, that people will remember and talk about whenever they find themselves in the company of their co-conspirators. when your co-conspirators aren’t around, i guess you just have to compensate. that’s a theory anyway.

went to a show last night. saw local shredders the awakening, and el scorpio. i’ve always really expected the awakening, byt was never super into them, but tonight, they actually blew me away, and i just kept thinking, “damn this is hot”. unfortunately, well for me at least, they’re going on tour so i won’t be able to see them for awhile. oh well, at least there’s silencio, my new favorite band. they play rich, technical music that combines elements of metal, jazz, math rock, and indie rock into a sweet package. seeing bands like them makes me want to quit playing guitar. also listening to sage francis a ton. he’s this white, straight-edge, vegetarian rapper from providence, ri. if the straight-edge/veggie thing wasn’t enough to make me like him, he also has amazing lyrical skills and enough insight to say something with the skills. oh yeah. down for converge after seeing them rock at more than music as well as jawbreaker because they’ve been on the house cd player.

anyway, i wanted to write more, but i’m exhausted … tomorrow for sure.

quote of the day – “you would have to kill me …”

originally written 06.24.2002

You would have to kill me and prop me up in the seat of my car with a smile painted on my face to get me to go near Hollywood.

– philip k. dick, author of the short story minority report, now a major hollywood motion picture

my time in pa

originally written 06.24.2002

last week when i was in PA, I

• skateboarded with tim in my driveway
• stayed up all night listening to hardcore records, watching donny darko, playing pool, and watching the us get beat by poland
• talked about tech, life, and whatnot into the wee hours of the morning with patrick
• wrote an xmms plugin to append the currently playing MP3 song title to my e-mail signature
• watched wonder boys, dancer in the dark, and a bunch of neo genesis evangeleon episodes
• got called gevin by tim after he snorted lines of sugar
• wrote nice car batman on piece of paper and stuck it to the windshield of some boy racer’s car in the parking lot of the middlesex diner
• made a box monster costume to make fun of peter’s short lived stint working at carlisle cardboard container. unfortunately i had to leave before i got a chance to wear it
• listened to some of tim’s ever-expanding record collection
• enjoyed the fruits of my mom going into maximum baking mode: vegan cherry pie, chocolate cake, and chocolate chip cookies
• played soccer with tim, mario, peter, patrick, josh, chris, and brian and ate boca burgers cooked over a fire afterwards
• got rid of ms windows on my workstation
• watched a really bad harrisburg senators baseball game with my parents. snickered as my dad told the confused parking attendent that he had a bruised patella
• beat peter at scrabble because he gave up to get some sleep before an early shift at the box factory
• read the minority report short story and optic nerve, love and rockets, and lone wolf and cub comics.
• went to the mall and record stores with kavein, tim, and david. acted obnoxious and had a wonderful time
• colored a picture of a burning american flag at the burger king on above excursion
• went to church with my mom, got scolded for giggling with tim, talked to old people