i met holden caufield
Originally written 05.11.2002.
or at least i spent part of last night hanging out w/ this kid who, though perhaps not as endearing as the salinger protagonist, he has all the other traits. he lives in manhattan and got kicked out of his boarding school last year for drinking, and he’s now in edinburgh because his parents wanted to send him off to college somewhere where he wasn’t likely to face similar expulsion. this kid is ultra wealthy, or at least his parents are, to the point that he has more dollars than sense. at least he’s generous with his money as he was buying champagne and wine for everyone, handing out cigars, and smoking people up. oddly enough, he didn’t even have a pound to play poker; apparently he lives completely off his credit card. the thing about this kid is that he comes off as totally crazy – you never know if he’s telling the truth or totally lying. like the story he told about getting loked out on coke and ritalin and envisioning taliban fighters outside his window. when i went out this morning, he was passed out in the stairwell outside his flat*.
* apparently agatha also saw the kid in the stairwell and almost mistook him for dead. she was about to move him to the recovery position and start cpr when he awoke and assured her that he wasn’t dead, though he wished that he was.
teatotally
Originally written 05.11.2002.
reason one million, one thousand and three i don’t drink: the morning after. rob came down to the common room and told me that i should go upstairs and have a look at pete. i went upstairs and saw the tragic comedy of pete passed out next to his door, naked from the waist down, with his trousers around his ankles. rob, who had the unfortunate experience of having to step over pete on his way downstairs reported that pete was also clutching his exposed knob in his sleep. we hypothesized about how pete got into his present state. the prevailing theory is that pete went to the bathroom and couldn’t be bothered to pull his trousers up or make it the 6 feet to his bed. so what did rob and i do? we did what anyone would have done. we woke iain and got it all on videotape.